The Healing Power of Singing by Emm Gryner

Author:Emm Gryner
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: ECW Press
Published: 2021-09-28T00:00:00+00:00

Childhood Stuff

The whole time we are young our minds are being mapped. Our brains are literally growing and forming new neural pathways. During childhood and adolescence, we absorb information consciously and subconsciously, and that means we take in the good, the bad, and everything in between in a way that stamps us for life. Sound scary? Damn right it is. When I became a parent, I became very uneasy with this sense of having so much influence over another human. Just as easily as I could train my two-year-old daughter to sing “Changes” by Bowie and “Big Yellow Taxi” by Joni Mitchell, I would also be showing her a glimpse of how a woman lives, responds to life, and deals with everything from frustration to frivolity.

When we find ourselves having issues later in life, in relationships, career, health, mindset, and so on, quite often the root of our difficulties is a result of the attitudes, events, and behaviours that were burned into our psyche as children. We watched our parents act and react around issues of love, money, sex, religion, and politics, and the behaviours they modelled for us would shape us forever. Whether we liked it or not, and even if they were just trying their best, we were the pawns in Oceania and they were the Ministry of Truth, to reference Orwell’s 1984.

But this is where integrity can swoop in like a superhero. If we know our values, we can live in alignment with them. If we are unclear on our values, that’s when baggage from childhood can come to kick shit in. Our energy around doing good and living well becomes drained. If living a life of harmony is important to you, but all you remember are parents who slammed doors and threw planters at each other, you may come up against problems in your own relationships with believing that harmony can be achieved at all. If you were told as a child that you were a crappy singer, you move through life thinking that you are, indeed, a crappy singer. What’s worse is that because these attitudes were planted when we were too young to reject them, we go through life thinking that we are worthless and at fault.

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